The Wild 'Roos of Louisianna

kaylarStarred Page By kaylar, 21st Sep 2010 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Humour>Funny Stories

Telling tall tales, making fools out of the pin brain and the pompous

At Sharon's Bar

So Bigga, Barnsey, and Cudjoe, deep in their 'whites', (overproof white rum) were regaling the other career drinkers with their adventures of cutting cane in America.

Peggy, the dressmaker, who'd never been out of Kingston, was hanging on their every word, and so they were becoming extremely wordfull.

Bigga described the huge rattlesnakes he'd seen in the canepiece, and not to be outdone, Barnsey spoke of the alligators which swallowed Cutters whole.

Cudjoe, taking a bite of his drink shook his head.

"Nothing is more dangerous than those vicious kangaroos..." he said.

The Dangers They Don't Mention

When Cudjoe brought up the kangaroos, Bigga and Barnsey exchanged looks, then poured another round, as Sharon's Bar fell silent.

"When them come down here to recruit Sugar Workers, they never warn us about those vicious Kangaroos they have in Louisiana..."

"A true..." choked Barnsey. Bigga coughed for a few seconds, while Cudjoe paused until he'd finished.

Then lighting a smoke, went on to describe how he workers would be cutting cane and suddenly, up would hop a kangaroo, knock out a worker, and hop away.

He went on to mention men, big men, who were actually killed by these vicious kangaroos, and Bigga admitted he'd heard about them but never actually seen one.

Barnsey, not to be outdone, mentioned that a guy in his squad was found dead lying in the track and they found 'Roo prints, so know that it was a kangaroo which killed him.

Peggy was terrified, asked many questions and the Cutters answered as best they could.

Very late that night, as she made her way home, she was thankful that there weren't kangaroos in Jamaica, although as she crossed the walk bridge she thought she might have seen one.

Sharing the Information

The Next day, Peggy was telling Maisey about the Kangaroos of Louisianna.

Maisey's big daughter, Verna, who went to High School interrupted, saying that there were no kangaroos in America.

Peggy told the girl that she didn't know what she was talking about. Last night, three men who had been to America, told her about the Kangaroos. They knew more than what was in some book someplace.

Verna didn't bother to argue, after all, what did she know?
She'd never been out of Kingston either.

The Warnings

After that night, Peggy and those who shared her brain, took it upon themselves to warn all those who thought of going to America to cut cane about those dangerous Kangaroos.

Nothing anyone could say would dislodge her certainty that there were kangaroos in America.

As stupid people only listen to other stupid people there are many people in Jamaica who believe with evrery shred of their being that the Cane fields of Louisianna are infested with vicious kangaroos


Fool, Jamaica, Kangaroo, Lie, Louisianna, Sugarcane, Tale, Trick

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author avatar kaylar
I am passionate about history, culture, current events, science and law

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author avatar Mark Gordon Brown
22nd Sep 2010 (#)

but.. I live in Canada, and know a guy who breeds Wallabies. I inquired about buying one once...

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author avatar James R. Coffey
22nd Sep 2010 (#)

I wanna have a beer with that roo!

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author avatar kaylar
22nd Sep 2010 (#)

that roo looks like he's a career drinker

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author avatar Jack Wellman
2nd Sep 2011 (#)

I love this...I believe that I know Verna.

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author avatar kaylar
3rd Sep 2011 (#)

ahh, she's kind of common

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