The Boots, the Creek, and the Apples

Quoiky By Quoiky, 5th Jul 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Humour>Funny Stories

This is about everyday life on a farm with three grand kids.

The Boots The Creek And The Apples

The grandkids and I were collecting the last of the apples that were still dangling from the tree. The only problem was, they were dangling from a branch hanging directly over the muddy creek. So, to help with our collection, I bought some ‘mud boots,’ which are high rubber boots, and on a normal person, they would come to their mid-calves, but on me it’s more like mid-knee. Ordinarily, it’s a good thing to have high boots if ya need to wade in a creek… unless ya step in the mud of the slow-flowing, mucky, muddy creek. The mud was like stepping into glutinous, gummy, quick-sand. I had the grandkids wait on the ‘grassy knoll,’ while I made my descent into the creek.

Note to self: wearing knee high boots does not make you taller, especially if said boots get stuck in the mud and fill up with icy, icky, muddy water, which slowly sucks you under - inch by inch. Picture this: I’m in the creek with my knee high boots. My right foot is already well below the water and mud level, so much so that my boot is now full of icy, muddy water, causing a wonderfully tight suction on my right foot and leg. It felt like the Devil himself had hold of my foot! I tried to free myself with my left foot by stepping on a broken, rotting tree branch, which immediately sinks. My legs are now about two feet apart. I look like I’m riding an invisible horse. The more weight I put on my right foot trying to wriggle my left foot free, the deeper I go, and visa versa. I’m nearly crotch level with the creek by now.

The kids were still watching from the side. Nobody panicked, except me. Everybody who knows me - knows that I’m not much of a praying person, but there was a lot of “Jesus! Mary! and Joseph’s!” being chanted that day! Hayden ran to the side of the creek, found a long branch and threw it to me. Emma yelled “I’ll go call Daddy to bring the tractor!” Damien said… “Gram, can you get me that apple hanging over there?”

By using the stick Hayden threw, and grabbing some small trees, I was able to free my left foot from the boot-water-mud grave. I stretched a little more and put my bare, left, foot on the same small trees I was holding. Gripping the tiny branches with my toes like a monkey, I finally pulled out my bootless-black-mud-covered, bare, right foot. If anybody wants those apples they can go get ‘em, and if anybody wants a perfectly good pair of knee high mud boots, they’re in the creek. If you can find ‘em, you can have ‘em!

Tags

Apples, Boots, Creek, Funny Stories, Kids

Meet the author

author avatar Quoiky
Joyce, (a.k.a. Quoiky) is a 'seasoned' writer {only in the sense of age} She is a wife, mother, grandmother & usually writes about real life & funny experiences, but also enjoys writing fiction.

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Comments

author avatar Margaret Michel
8th Jul 2014 (#)

This was totally enjoyable! Thanks for sharing! Gotta love little Damien!

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author avatar Quoiky
8th Jul 2014 (#)

Thanks and I do love the little scamp!

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