Memba Ben By Memba Ben, 15th May 2017 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Humour>Funny Stories

A valuable lesson I learnt in high school about improvisation.

Moral of the story - Practice goes a long way than just doing things on the fly

When I was in high school, there were many girls I liked but there was this one girl who was a friend but I was absolutely infatuated with. I was pining for her in a way that a sexually frustrated teenager would. Had she asked anything of me, I would have said yes in a heartbeat (yes, I was one of those guys). So when she came up to me asking that I perform with her at the talent show, I jumped at the opportunity.

Maybe this is an opportunity for me to get closer to her

With the weeks building up to the talent show, I hoped we would get time alone to practice but she had other things going on so she suggested that we practiced on our own and come the talent show, we’d pull through. Me being me, I never bothered to practice. I was just focused on normal teenager things and getting this girl to be something more than just a friend.

Well; me being the dumb ass I am, I was oblivious to the fact that time flies when you aren’t paying attention to it. It was during break when she came up to me, all excited and shit talking about how she can’t wait for tonight.


“The talent show!!!...You did practice, didn’t you?”

“….Of course! What time do you want to meet up for final rehearsal?”

“After school is fine!”

“Great, see you then.”


I spent the second half of school frantically trying to think up ways to duck the talent show but knew she wouldn’t forgive me considering I told her I’d be ready. With no other alternative, I just searched for the lyrics to Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On with the hope of memorizing them but nothing was going in.

Fuck it, I’m gonna wing it

When school ended, I avoided my partner like the plague while trying my best to at least remember the chorus and whatever lines I could. Despite all her calls and messages, I ignored them. This was way more important.

The hour came and she was looking divine. I couldn’t help but shower her with compliments, all which made her blush and her reaction gave me a bit of hope that things could work out. While performers went on and did their thing, we were backstage getting ready for a huge performance.

Just as it was our turn, she does the most disastrous thing imaginable; she thanks me for doing this with her and decides to give me a kiss on the cheek. With that single moment, my mind blanked out. I couldn’t remember anything else except for what had just happened.

And we were about to go on stage.

I thought things would be easy, that somewhere in my subconscious, the words would come tumbling out as soon as I heard the beat.

Turns out I only knew one line.

Like an idiot, I was just standing there, repeating that very line:

"Every night in my dreams, I see you, I seeeeeeee you, that is how I know you, go oooooon"

Never have I seen someone go from being enthusiastic to misery so quickly.

Never have I heard a crowd silence that quick.

I think the worst part wasn’t my humiliating performance, but it was the fact that my partner actually sang pretty well and I had to go fuck it up. Needless to say, there weren’t any kisses exchanged after the show (or ever) and I haven’t participated in any karaoke or singing events since.

In a matter of five minutes, one day in my mid-teens went from being one of the best to one of the worst, and it was all because I didn’t know a damn Celine Dion song.


Humour, Talent Show, True Story

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author avatar Memba Ben
A fan's view on the business of football.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
19th May 2017 (#)

It is. Just need a microphone and and can sing. I do it. Yep I sang this number too.

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author avatar Memba Ben
29th May 2017 (#)

How did it go for you, Lady Aiyanna?

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