My Cat is STONED!!

Jack GoblinStarred Page By Jack Goblin, 2nd Mar 2014 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Humour>Funny Stories

My cat came back from the veterinarian recently. He is on pain meds. He is also in la-la land...

My Cat...

One of my cats - I'll call him 'C' to protect his privacy - recently had to have a tooth removed. This isn't exactly a fun event for a cat. Or for the cat owner, especially when the bill is presented. But 'C' is not unhappy at the moment; because 'C' is on pain meds and I suspect is tripping balls.

Is Acting...

I noticed when I was bringing him home from the vet that instead of his usual in-car behavior - piercing screams and desperate efforts to get out of his carrier - he was calm and quiet. Thank goodness. Probably because the vet had given him a dose of pain medication shortly before I picked him up. At home he seemed content to either wander aimlessly and somewhat unsteadily about the house or - whenever I was close - flop over on his back for a belly / muzzle rub.

I thought at first he was just begging for food in an unusual way, since he hadn't had anything to eat all day due to the surgery. But even after I fed him (soft food, of course), he remained an overly affectionate and rather oddly behaving kitty. His brother and co-conspirator - who, to continue to protect the innocent, we will call 'P' - seemed puzzled by such goofiness and sniffed his butt frequently to make sure this WAS 'C'.


The only change in attitude came when it was time to give 'C' the next dose of pain medication, squirting a small amount of it into his mouth between cheek and gum. Unfortunately newly detoothed 'C' had NO wish to have anyone do anything with his mouth right then, and got a bit fractious. But things were resolved with only a minor amount of my blood shed and at least some of the medicine in his mouth.

After which we went to bed. Or at least I went to bed, he spent much of the night wandering around making odd vocalizations and pawing at things. Like me. It was not hard to imagine him going "Oh wow oh wow oh wow, am I high!" After an hour of this I got up, picked up both cats, and threw them out of the room, closing the door behind them. They both started scratching at the door to be let back in, but I ignored them and managed to get SOME sleep.

Stranger than normal, even.

Since then he has continued being weird. He seems newly fascinated by the stairs in my house, staring up if he's at the bottom or down if he's at the top. I suspect, in his doped up state, it looks as if they're moving like an escalator and he's not sure what to make of it.

Whenever I use the stairs though, he overcomes any misgivings and often tries to get to a step ahead of me and roll over on his back again, apparently convinced I'll have to pet him to get by. And in his current state, sometimes he rolls the wrong way and falls completely off the step he's on down to the next one. I just sigh and keep him from rolling all the way down the stairs like a rag doll.

He's gotten a bit steadier on his feet as time goes on, but he's not jumping up on counters, beds, and tables as he did before surgery. The room may be spinning around for him. He's also lost interest in what used to be a favorite past-time, staring out the window at a bird feeder nearby and making 'chi-chi-chi' sounds at the morsels outside. His brother continues watching the birdies with rapt attention, and some times gets so caught up that he hurls himself at the window in a pounce. Fortunately the glass is thick, and all that results is a "WHAM". 'C' however has turned away from such pursuits - literally - as if to proclaim "Can't we all just get along? All I am saying is, give peace a CHANCE!"

Then he rolls over on his back and tries to get another rub, paws in the air. He is so feeling no pain.


I'm to keep giving him pain medication for a week. Doing so is getting easier, but it still kills his buzz so he's not happy when I bring out the squirter, and tends to try to get away. Of course afterwards, if I succeed in getting the dose in him, he has no choice but to be happy, and his feet barely touch the ground as he walks. Assuming no infection sets in, he should be back to his normal, 'engine of destruction' self soon.

Meantime I keep looking at the vet bill. And wishing *I* had some pain meds.

Media Source: Wikimedia Commons

Some links to earlier misadventures involving my two little hell-beasts.

I think My Cats Are Trying To Kill Me

Amusing Cats

My Cat Is Being Irritating


Cat, Cats, Feline Dentistry, Happy Time, Pain Medication, Pets, Veterinarian

Meet the author

author avatar Jack Goblin
Was born. Haven't died yet. Don't intend to anytime soon.

Thank you much for reading my articles. I hope they brought you pleasure and enlightenment. :)

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author avatar Mariah
2nd Mar 2014 (#)

Bloody brilliant, I'm sore with laughing so much..long live 'C'
and 'P' and may their privacy never be violated ha ha..all round priceless post..thanks for such great entertainment..

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author avatar Mark Gordon Brown
2nd Mar 2014 (#)

When our cats would come home from the vet after being neutered they were pretty dopey as well

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author avatar joyalariwo
3rd Mar 2014 (#)

Hilarious piece Jack, was grinning from ear to ear on this one.
I hope the infamous "C" gets better.

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
4th Mar 2014 (#)

Hes done for the count!

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author avatar Retired
5th Mar 2014 (#)

This was a hilarius post! I have had cats before so I could just see this cat acting this way.

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author avatar Margaret Michel
12th Jul 2014 (#)

Love the cat pics!!!

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