Imprisoned by Political Correctness

Paul Butters By Paul Butters, 2nd Nov 2010 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Humour>Off Beat

Fed up of having to watch your Ps and Qs? Read on...

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I am a straight white middle aged British male. That means I am not allowed to use any words that might offend anyone, say, gay black or coloured young or old foreign female. Of course, they may call me Whitey, Limey, Pom, Male Chauvinist Pig or whatever. Am I missing a derogatory word for being straight or single here?

In the 1980s or 90s I recollect a couple of our training sessions (as Careers Advisers actually). A lady in one group exercise made a joke about running activities for both males and females. During the whole-group feedback I made a similar joke. There was a loud shout from a young lady at the back of the hall. “Plagiarist?” Oh no, even though I was guilty of that. The actual yell was, “You male sexist pig!” My friend Tony said, “You aren’t going to take that are you Paul?” But I did. I just gestured to the chair for proceedings to continue without any reply from me. I did not want my bosses to see me embroiled in a row. Afterwards I tried to question and placate the girl but she said, “I still think you are one!”

On another occasion I was making an important speech on education but used the word Headmaster. About twenty female “feminists” (their own title) jumped on me for not saying Headteacher.

Later I got into hot water for telling a girl that the word Paki was a bastardisation of Pakistani.

And where have those Gollywog dolls gone? Oh, of course... Better not feel niggardly about this eh?

So, my mouth is taped up. Or so they say. Frankly I feel like using politically incorrect words deliberately in order to fight back. Now I would reply to the “male sexist” girl: “Shouldn’t you be home doing the washing up dear?”

Might as well live up to my stereotype.


Chauvinist, Female, Freedom Of Expression, Funny, Gender Roles, Harassment, Humor, Male, Political Correctness, Sexist

Meet the author

author avatar Paul Butters
I am a Writer. Freelance in that I am not employed any more, being retired. I can write more than ever now. Academically I have a B.Ed. Honours Degree in English Literature from Leeds (Huddersfield) University. Taught Secondary (13-18) English in the...(more)

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author avatar TheMovieScene
2nd Nov 2010 (#)

Put simply the world has gone politically correct crazy and it sucks. Don't get me wrong I would never go out intentionally to offend someone by refering to them in a derogatory manner but in my opinion there are phrases which can be used in innocence yet are all too often taken out of context.

It makes me wonder how Alf Garnett would survive in this day and age, lol.

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author avatar Denise O
5th Nov 2010 (#)

I don't get this PC crap either.
We all can be respectful and yet tell a flippin good joke now and then.
Heck, I make fun of my so called "peeps" and that would be me.
Geesh folks, get a funny bone.
Laugh at yourself and the world will be a better place.
Thank you for sharing.:)

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author avatar Melissa Dawn
8th Nov 2010 (#)

I once told my Grade 3 teacher that I was not a Caucasian. She patiently explained I was. I equally patient explained my people had been nowhere near Asia! I feel your pain here fella, but thanks for the smiles (andthe article prompt)

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