I'm Sorry!

The Borderline By The Borderline, 23rd Oct 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/3n7z_5ok/
Posted in Wikinut>Humour>Poetry

A person who can't seem to do anything right for a dear friend and is very sorry.

I'm Sorry!

I wanted to be a good friend
So I went to your house
Early this morning
To bake you cookies while you were away
Sadly, I forgot to turn the stove off
As a result, your house burned down
So did the cookies
My apologies

Luckily, I saved your fish!
I grabbed the fish bowl
Raced right out of the house
And escaped the burning flames
However, I forgot how much to feed the fish
And they all died from overfeeding.
I am really very sorry.

I decided to make up for it and bury the fish
I buried them near your new tomato plants
Finally, I did something right!
(Giving myself a pat on the back :))

But your dogs saw me bury the fish
when I let them out of their kennel to run about
They dug up the tomato plants
And had fish for lunch
The tomatoes are now as dead as the fish.
I am really, really sorry!

I decided to put the dogs away
But instead of opening the gate to the kennel
I opened the gate to the front yard
Your dogs escaped and were captured by animal control.
Have I mentioned lately that I am sorry?

I drove to the pound in your car
To pick up your dogs
When they were put in my car they became wild
And I totaled the car
My sorrow is beyond words for your misfortune

I walked the dogs back to your home
And I saw you on the front lawn
Moaning and sobbing
Your house was gone
And you were certain your fish, dogs, and car had gone up in flames too

I ran as fast as I could to comfort you
But then I tripped
And fell
And fell
And Fell
Until I fell on you
And now it seems I’ve broken a few of your bones as well
Whoopsy daisies!

But that ‘s okay!
Because I’m a doctor!
I can fix you…

I’ve just remembered…
I recently got my license revoked
The medical board said I was too clumsy

I am truly sorry.


Humor, Story Poem

Meet the author

author avatar The Borderline
I'm someone who writes in order to stay sane. You can expect to see writing on a variety of topics from me.

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author avatar Adil Shereef
30th Oct 2015 (#)

Truly amusing!!!. I really like the way you ended up ruining his entire property just after letting him happy about you protecting it.. A job well done!! Looking forward.

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author avatar Marcus Writes
10th Nov 2015 (#)

Fascinating. Reading your piece took me to a roller coaster ride. Very entertaining.

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
10th Nov 2015 (#)

Nice poem and with a lot of feeling!

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author avatar Susan Hauck
11th Nov 2015 (#)

This was so sardonically funny! I enjoyed it so much! Thanks for the share!

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