Secrets Your Demon Won't Tell you.
Information, near poetry, lies, corporate lies and pure garbage from Hades new and revived PR department to inform clients and Demons, Fiends and Devils of Hades by the River Styx and all of its multiple sights and sounds.
- Secrets From Fur and Fang, Things They Didn't Tell You. Demonic Secrets,
- Creative Stress Inducers Continued.
- Other Demonic News Of The Week.
- The Poet's Demonic Corner.
Secrets From Fur and Fang, Things They Didn't Tell You. Demonic Secrets,
Written by Demoness Donna Dump for Digested Readers
1. Nothing is more fun than a sackful of ferrets. Your young one can carry the sack to school and when teach becomes more boring than, say, reading Jane Austen, they can release them one by one creating general chaos, panic and general hysteria. Old demon secret.
2. Your young demoness can be very hysterical and demonstrative by having a hissy-fit, taking off her training bra and hurling stones with it while screaming invectives at the top of her voice. Hissy- fits are an excellent way to reduce tension and stress and are effective regardless of age or sex. At this point, speaking of sex, it's time for the young sprouts to sit down with their parents and explain the latest clinical details and experimental sex to them with charts, photos, and artwork.
Creative Stress Inducers Continued.
3.Another way of reducing stress, and favorite demon secret, is to stuff some clients suggestion box with snakes and stand around while the poor box owner dumps the contents of the box on his desk and goes bonkers and has to be revived by our Heimlich Maneuver Team # 5639
4.Stress can be fun. Open a store selling college memorabilia and print all items with ink that will vanish on first washing. The ink is an old demon secret that is available from Demon Dugeon, Pit # Ru-66909, District UDB, Ash Heap Road, Styx Landing 43. Contribution required.
5. Collect old porno magazines for the nursing home in your division and have an above-ground operative scatter them on each seat at a political convention. Republican or Democrat? Your choice, Bozo...politics ain't brain surgery. It isn't rocket science either,
6. Go to an airline luggage area and cut the handles off each piece of luggage, then stand around and watch. This operation is a scream and the best party-ice breaker secret we know.
7.Go to your nearest porno library start a drum circle. As the drums pound creating a true infernal racket, start chanting and scratching. A howling stress-buster and birthday party novelty for the boys and girls, fiends, demons and devils..
8. Vote for your Local Demons and Fiends by having one of our above-ground operatives go to a cemetery and copy down names and dates from the tombstones. Then you will have a list of voters to use in the next district election that get your candidate elected. Yes. This is one of the oldest "secrets" in the vaults. The Chief uses it every election to get his stooges re-elected.
Other Demonic News Of The Week.
Congratulations to Demonesses, Dither, Nipple Rings, Donna Wanna, Lucille Lucid, Marlo Harlow, and Lilly Marlane for graduating magna cum laude from Scarlet Letter University last week. Way to go, ladies!
The Ladies Auxiliary of "Sundial In A Closet Society" announced today that this year's Annual Drunken Brawl will be held the week of August 32. Members are advised to start brewing some high-octane whisky now and to start filing their fangs and horns. It's going to be a real ball.
The Poet's Demonic Corner.
Down in the dumps where the air is foul.
Furtive creatures scurry and prowl,
While unknown things burrow and growl,
And dreadful things are left to howl.
There was an old dragon named Tuglo
Whose .internal fires were burning low.
So they posted the big lizard,
Along with an ancient wizard,
To the kitchen to bake cookie dough.
By Demon Dungeon ,Pit #684, Supervisor
Copyright 2012/ htstone Written by that old fiend Count Sneaky